Movie - choti choti batein

c a m a r e d e r I e...

Camarederie---yeah! this was something which i had an opportunity to be a part of and for the rest of my life i will continue to cherish those simple pleasures of life,those moments of jocundity and melancholy,all that which helped me grow as a person,from the naive mama's boy to a relatively mature and composed Kaustav of 2010.Speaking of camarederie,one name which stirs me even today and probably will,as long as my senses are not benumbed,is Shubho,my batchmate...it was a crudity of destiny that we are miles apart today,living in the same city,but Shubho and his memoirs keep fleeting when I go past Coffee House on a laid -back sultry afternoon,or happen to pass through the alleys of North Kolkata!Never before had i experienced such a compassion for a guy in my life...and candidly speaking,he was the person to make me feel my existence on this earth as an alternate human being --who eventually discovered himself to be a labyrinthe of contradictions;a criscross of perplexities!!

heard melodies...contd

St.Paul's College has been a witness to many of my FIRST-S in life~and of course LAST-S too! My first crush happened here,should i say crush? well....i would not be hyperbolic if i say it was one of the loveliest moments I had experienced in my life-i would not take her name here...she was exquisite,unique in her own way and most importantly,she was ''my type''! I was too shy to go and say ''i love you''....nothing of that sort happened,but it was an impulse which both of us could feel,and enjoyed.I remember she had played Sharatchandra's Kamallata in one of the plays at the college fest ...it was actually a collage of songs and dialogues mouthed by some of the celebrated lovers of literature~TIMELESS,IMMORTAL lovers...and i had the opportunity to sing some songs of Tagore for the play...RUP THEKE ARUPEY...the rehearsal sessions were really worth remembering for I used to wait for Kamallata at the corridors bunking my Political Science pass classes...

heard melodies are sweet...but those unheard are sweeter!

my college days were quite eventful-believe me,I could never think of mingling in a heterogenous group of people ,so very different from me in all respects...It just happened! i was quite apprehensive of whether I would be able to come out from the COSY SECLUDED WORLD of my shell.Studying 'English Honours' was my dream come true...i felt my hitherto unexplored and rusted creative potentiality would find an outlet now.I had the advantage of being an ex student of the college,so might be somewhere deep in my heart there was an air of pride or panache,if i can use the term. The memory of my first class in my undergraduate course is still afresh--Prof.Ajanta Paul,whom we used to call AP ma'am entered room GD, with the register at the farthest corner of the campus(Ajanta Ma'am will require an entire episode in my blog so,I am not going into the details right now;all that I can say is its because of her profound influence that i am jotting down these lines)When I attended her first class in class xi,I was literally in a reverie as she recited the lines -''I am the daughter of the Earth and Sky''...she had initiated me to Shelley(only meant to be learnt on a superficial level for a science student like me)and Keats and so tremendous was the impact that I couldn't afford to miss her in my honours class despite being selected in a so-called A-grade college of Kolkata...

...and now when she came to the honours class,I felt myself to be extremely blessed--she was taken aback to find me in that class and had said''tumi pure science er chatro chile na?'' I was really surprised to learn that she even remembered my name...

a new beginning(cond.)

It was really a heavenly dispensation that I didn't get a supplementary in mathematics,in my +2 exams!It was a regular nightmare which kept me prophecising that i had failed in maths.....I still remember the d-day when the results were declared....GOSH!!!!! I WAS TREMBLING,SWEATING,PALPITATING and what not.....Finally,as the list was put up, one of my batchmates,Chandan came and hugged me----''tu Maths me pass ho gaya...........'' the feeling must have been something close to delivering a baby(as I knew it courtesy internet)....now,the path was paved for my career in real sense of the term...

A NEW BEGINNING...

life at Kolkata was not that easy,specially for a naive guy,hitherto unaccustomed to a metro city, like me.My classmates were amicable and co-operated with me but somewhow the hangover of my erstwhile alma mater remained! Being somewhat shy and unsporty,I was also bullied by some of my mates(they now feel guilty and have also proclaimed that publicly )...I came out with a dilligent result in my boards ,if not extraordinarily good.After this,my life could have taken a different turn had my father and the other so called ''well wishers'' not forcibly driven me into studying Science,as they thought it was below the dignity of a family,academically so resplendant, to have one of its predecessors ending up with an arts degree...(as all my cousins were engineers and doctors from 'tagged' institutes)I had no other option but to subjugate to the imperative statements of my paternal elders...Kaustav,destined to study Shakespeare, Keats and Lawrence had to bear the yoke of that BIG FAT horrible book of Mechanics by C.R.Dasgupta and those endlessly ennuing practical classes with the foul odour of SO2 choking my nasal passage!!!!

exodus...

The exodus from my native land to Kolkata,was agonising! I was caught off guard when my parents suddenly decided to leave north-east because of the ever increasing terrorist activities-as baba used to be on official tours,maa was perturbed as to how she would handle precarious situations....moreover my maternal uncles and aunts insisted that we shift because I wasn't getting ample scope to learn music properly.It was June, 1992----I was sent to Kolkata with two of my mesho's office employees(that was even more painful,which I understood much later)as my session had already commenced.I was denied the opportunity of meeting my school mates,even......... I remember I didn't eat throughout the journey---and fleeting memories of my teachers,friends, the beloved musanda plant,bleeding heart,'raggy'-the pet dog of our landlord,and school bus no-7 ....kept invading me!